Escalators and other things that "go bump" in the heart

The other day I took one of my good friends to down town Indy for the first time. She had never been there before so naturally I took her to the Circle Center Mall. She was excited for the new experience, but as we parked in the lower level garage and approached the entrance to the mall, something came over her.

She stopped in her tracks, and I could see in her eyes the only thing she wanted to do was head back to the car and get out of there fast. I looked around to see if there was a creepy old man. .. Nope that wasn’t the answer. Then I checked my teeth . . . nothing there. I was stumped but then I saw what she was staring at.

The thing that was striking so much fear in my friend’s heart was a very simple set of escalators. There wasn’t anything new or tricky about them. They were plain old normal escalators . . . but there seemed to be something more going on . . . it seemed like these escalators held a power over my friend rendering her legs inoperable.

But I wasn’t going to let this escalator win . . . I mean it was an inanimate object . . . so I thought I could take it down. I would use my intellect and logic and I would defeat this possessed escalator and free my friend from it’s strangle-hold.

So I gently grabbed the back of my friends arm, told her it would be alright and we both got on the escalator . . . she didn’t breath for the 15 seconds we were on that “hellish” ride . . . but she made it . . . we defeated the evil beast
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When I was a kid I remember being terrified of an escalator. I vividly remember shopping with my mother, and her getting on the escalator, while my feet just wouldn’t move me on with her. I remember seeing her get further and further away; further down and further away. I remember balling and being so very scared.

Another thing I was scared of as a kid was sitting on the toilet. I remember watching one of those “real stories” TV shows, where they tell you unbelievable events that have happened that you should believe. The episode that scared me away from the toilet involved a giant snake coming into a family’s home through the toilet. Every time I had to “go”, I was worried a snake would come up and bite me. This was a tragic experience for me. (I still check the toilet for snakes today)

Indiana Jones has this famous fear of snakes. It seems like in every Indiana Jones movie or story he comes into contact with some huge snake, a ridiculous amount of snakes, or is trapped with snakes in a very small space. I remember the paralyzing fear that would come over him, at each of these encounters.

Fears are normal. Everyone has them. Everyone has some of them. There are even really cool names for very weird fears, like . . .

Aulophobia- Fear of flutes
Arachibutyrophobia- Fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth (I suffer from this one)
Trichopathophobia- Fear of hair
Helmintophobia- Fear of being infested with worms (who isn’t afraid of this)
Chronophobia- Fear of time
Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words (oh the irony)
Phobophobia- Fear of fear (a little redundant ?)

There is pretty much an “official” sounding name for any fear you can think of. That’s how fear-ridden we are as human beings. Not only do we fear things, but when you put us all together there is at least one person who fears every different thing in life.

Fear has this crippling effect . . . just like my friend and escalators, my childhood & toilets, Indiana Jones & snakes . . . something strange happens when we are afraid. It is as if our fears overtake who we are and start making decisions for us.

Fear stops us in our tracks . . . and keeps us from doing what we want to do, or what we NEED to do.
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I have lots of fears right now in my life. Things that keep me from doing what I want or need to do. At times I really do feel crippled in how I live my life, how I interact with others, and in the way that I handle myself.

This summer it even has gotten to the point of being so overwhelming at times, that I really wonder where my fears hid me, because the real me is hard to find.

I decided a while ago, that I liked the old me better.

Knowing that my fears and insecurities were holding me back; I have been trying to keep my eyes, ears, and heart open to the spiritual realities about our fears.

And like with most things in life, before I realized it God started revealing exactly what I needed.
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There is this story of a time when Jesus was teaching a huge crowd. He was trying to communicate to the masses to avoid “the yeast of the Pharisees”, which was knowing what was right but not doing it (hypocrisy). Apparently either there was some uneasiness about this statement or Jesus just knew the hearts of the people in the crowd. Because he follows that statement with this one . . .

“I tell you, my friends, do not be afraid of those who kill the body and after that can do no more. But I will show you whom you should fear: Fear him who, after the killing of the body, has power to throw you into hell. Yes, I tell you, fear him.”

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When I was younger I always thought this referred to the devil, but let’s not make that mistake here. The “him” is the one who sits in judgment on humanity. That means the one you should fear is God. You should be afraid of God.

I don’t know about you but for some reason that statement doesn’t sit well with me. It doesn’t seem like the God I know. There has to be some more depth to it. I mean I never saw Jesus and his followers running around being afraid of God or what he was doing. What I do see, is Jesus making simple yet tough statement that were very deep . . . that was just the way he liked to roll.

Fearing God is not a “new” idea. The books of Psalms and Proverbs mention fearing God (and the benefits of it over 70 times.

King Solomon, the wisest man to ever live summed up the purpose of life this way:
“Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man.”

Now this is just speculation on my part but I think when Jesus was talking to this crowd, he was hinting at why we should fear God. He specifically says fear the one who after killing the body has the power to throw you into hell.

There seems to be an emphasis on God’s ability to judge souls . . . and that power is something we should fear.

This is more speculation on my part, but I believe there is something much bigger going on in our hearts when we fear someone or something.

This may seem like a stretch but take a minute to seriously think about it.

I think the reason we are told to only fear God is because in the end, when we fear something, in a strange way we worship it; and we are only supposed to five God our worship.

Think about it; if our fears paralyze us, and shape our decisions and behavior. If we give our fears priority to mold us and our lives; how is that any different from giving priority to God? The motivator may be different but the end result is the same. We are responding to something (God or our fears) saying through our actions, you are important and significant. You are significant enough to effect the decisions I make every day. In this way our fears become the object of our “worship”.

That is why we should only fear God.
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I have another friend who has recently taken on the challenge of conquering her fears and insecurities head on. I have been really proud of her. You see her wounds are very deep. She has been hurt, abandoned, and crushed by the people she cared most for in life. So when life does it normal routine of mixing things up, it is very hard for her to trust. In the back of her mind she fears those she loves most abandoning her once again.

She made the decision that she was not going to let these fears and insecurities control her life anymore. It has been an amazing thing to watch and be a part of; I truly have been blessed to be part of her healing process. And that is just it. It is a process. Fears don’t disappear overnight. And some insecurities can not be resolved without the help of others. It takes a ton of courage to overcome these fears and it takes a lot of love.

The Apostle John once wrote “There is no fear in love, for perfect love drives out fear”
That is the key to overcoming fear . . . to giving it up and not allowing it to control us any longer. We need “perfect” love to drive out the fears in our lives. I think this love obviously comes from God, but I also see a huge theme of Jesus’ teachings being his followers helping others heal. He calls us to help bring physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual healing.

So thanks to my friend I think I have the courage to beat my fears, and I think I have the right people in my life to show me the perfect kind of love that drive out fear.

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The first step to driving out the fear in your life is to put it out there. It is to bring our fears into the light, instead of letting them linger in the dark. When we keep our fears to ourselves they tend to “go bump” in our hearts and cause us that paralyzing damage we discussed before.
So let me bring some of my fears into the light. Let me expose my insecurities for what they are and with the grace of God and the love of others around me, let the power they hold over me be broken.

*disclaimer - I am writing these things, not to have you refute any of them

(I realize many of my fears are irrational, but they are my fears none the less)

· I am afraid that no one could ever love me again
· I fear never being able to do youth ministry again
· I worry that I am too “outside the box”
· I am afraid that I am not really a “good” person
· I fear living a wasted life
· I am afraid that everything was my fault
· I am afraid that I will let you down
· It’s my fear that everything important to me will fall apart
· I am afraid I am letting God down
· I worry that no one will ever really “get” me
· I fear that I am a failure
· I am afraid I will miss my purpose

These are the things that “go bump” in my heart. And today I choose to not make them the priorities of my life. From here on I will live, breathe, and move in love; perfect love which drives out fear. I will surround myself with others who are seeking and living out God’s love. I refuse to believe the lies that fuel my fears and insecurities.

Today I choose to fear God, knowing that he is so much bigger and larger than anything and everything else in life. And by fear I mean I will let the knowledge of who God is drive me to live a life in response to all that he has done, is doing , and will do in me, through me, around me, and even in spite of me. The only thing I will “fear” is being separated from the One who truly gives me life.
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I hope that you can do the same. I hope that while you are staring your fears in the eyes, and feeling your legs lock, unable to move forward, that something changes.

I pray that God puts the people in your life that can gently grab your arm, whisper softly that everything will be alright, and then join you on the “escalator”. And together (with God and others) you begin the journey to defeating your fears and insecurities.

I also pray that today you can be a “fear” fighter in the lives of the people you care about the most. That you will be that person to show perfect love and drive out the things that paralyze those dear to your heart.

And the end of the day I pray that you can say in your heart, the words to one of my favorite songs . . .

“God above all the world in motion . . .

God above all my hopes and fears . . .

And I don’t care what the world throws at me now . . .

I’m going to be alright”

Pimp My Life

Have you ever seen the show pimp my ride ?

I used to watch it, just to see how the car in each episode would top the car from the previous episode in awfulness.

Oh yeah and then there was xzibit . . . how can you not love xzibit ?

Honestly I know hardly anything about cars, but I would tune in each week to see how crazy and out there and awesome the vehicles would become after they had been “pimped”.

And if you watch the show then you know, during the commercial breaks you wonder what your car would look like “pimped out”

but it would never happen to me . . . you know because they say pimping ain’t easy.

Pimp my ride may seem very random, but I saw a commercial the other day for the new season, and I was taking a stroll down memory lane, and it got me thinking about some stuff that has been bubbling in my head for a while.

So let’s get out our proverbial bubble wand and blow.
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As mentioned in previous blogs, I am reading through Jeremiah. The last blog dealt with two big questions that Jeremiah asks, and asks often. They were two large themes. So let’s tackle the next big theme.

Restoration .

It’s a big word that sounds really important.

If you say it at church people might think you are really spiritual or something.

The dictionary defines restoration as the act of restoring (big surprise); renewal; revival; or reestablishment.

So do you get the picture ?

It’s like taking an old dresser and sanding it down, painting it, and putting new knobs on it.

It’s like sewing a hole up in your favorite pair of pants.

It’s like getting part for your car and replacing them.

That is restoration.

Let’s take a minute to look at a snapshot of Jeremiah and his situation.

So Jeremiah is a prophet – a spokesman for God. In this case, Jeremiah is one of only a few people who are true spokesmen for God. The other “prophets” out there are telling the people to do whatever they want and that includes worshipping other gods. A big no-no when it comes to Yahweh. At this point God’s people (Israel /Judah) are about to deal with the consequences of their sin.

And the consequence for them walking away from God, and to other idols is that God is going to allow another nation to take them into captivity. Basically they won’t be in charge of themselves at all; they will be servants, slaves, and the lower rung of society.

If you are a good Jew and you see this snap shot as it plays out, there is nothing you can say except that this is broken. This is not what God wanted for his people, and they way things are . . . it’s just not right.

It’s broken.

but that is not where things end. God has something more in mind.

Here is what he says to Jeremiah :

“don't miss this: The time is coming when no one will say any longer, 'As sure as God lives, the God who delivered Israel from Egypt.' What they'll say is, 'As sure as God lives, the God who brought Israel back from the land of the north, brought them back from all the places where he'd scattered them.' That's right, I'm going to bring them back to the land I first gave to their ancestors.”
-Jeremiah 16:14-15 (the message)

Did you catch that . . . God promised restoration.

He told Jeremiah even though the people are going to go through this, I am going to bring them back. I am going to restore them.

Wow . . . that’s all I can say. I mean seriously do you see how HUGE this idea is. Maybe you don’t . . . so think about it. God’s people deserved what they were getting . . . and they deserved to stay there in captivity. The deserved to be separated, to be cut off. They deserved their brokenness.

But God said . . . “ I will restore them”

That is the beauty of grace . . . it makes life not fair (thanks Relient K)

What makes this even more HUGE is that this is not some isolated event with God.

Paul describes it this way “if anyone is in Christ he is a new creation, the old has gone the new has come!”

This is a pattern. This is a characteristic that defines who God is.

God is in the restoration business.

It’s something he has done, is doing, and will continue to do.

And as I have been wrestling with this idea this week, I think it is much HUGER than we recognize.

Fact – here is the way the church (on a whole) views things . . .

We sin and that separates us from God. Jesus came and died to bridge that gap and take away our sin. We try not to sin, in order to be more like Christ . . . in turn to bring others to him.

That is basically how we view things. It’s a nice little equation. And I am not saying it’s wrong. I just think it is a little incomplete.

I don’t know about you, but for me there has to be something more, something deeper going on, than just some sort of transaction, where Jesus takes away what I owe.

I believe God is just so much deeper than that.

And as I read about Jesus and his teachings, it spurns me on to say that there is something more that God wants, than for me to be “saved”

There is something he wants to do with my life, with your life. Something specific, something meaningful.

And while I was having these thoughts this week, I read the following –

“God isn’t just interested in the covering over of our sins; God wants to make us into the people we were originally created to be. It is not just the removal of what’s being held against us; it is God pulling us into the people he originally had in mind when he made us. This restoration is why Jesus always orients his message around becoming the kind of people who are generous and loving and compassionate. The goal here isn’t simply to not sin . . . it’s not about what you don’t do. The point is becoming more and more the kind of people God had in mind when we were first created. It is one thing to be forgiven; it is another thing to become more and more and more and more the person God made you to be.”
-Rob Bell (Velvet Elvis, Chapter 4: Tassels)

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So let’s finish the bubbling, and wrap this up.

God is like Xzibit (or how he used to be); they are both in the restoration business.
In each episode of Pimp my Ride they do two things:

1) They fix all the important stuff that needs fixing so the vehicle will work.
2) They put all the flashy stuff to make it “pimped” out.

In the end, they have a fully restored vehicle that everyone would like to have.

I think God wants to do the same thing.

God wants to pimp your life.

Not that he wants to give you all the flashy things, but he does want you to be who he created you to be. And whatever that is, it is special. It is specific. God know exactly who he wants you to be.

Maybe that is a scary thing . . . but for me it is exhilarating.

God has an awesome plan for me. He knows exactly how to use me to build and establish his kingdom best. And I don’t know about you, but I desperately want that life.

I want to live life to the fullest. I want to squeeze everything I can out of it, for God’s glory. I want to forcefully advance God’s kingdom.

I don’t know about you, but for that person to develop in my life. I need some restoration. I need God to fix the essentials, and give me all the special things I need to be who he created me to be.

I’m betting you and I are pretty similar.

I’m betting you need some restoration too.

If you do, then you can pray the same prayer with me today

“Lord, please pimp my life”

mall walkers

Mall walkers are intense.

If you are unfamiliar with the term . . . mall walkers are those people who go to the mall and walk inside the perimeter in order to get exercise. Most of the time these people are older and many times they are retired.

I have seen many mall walkers in my days. And every time I see them, I am amazed / scared at their intensity.

I know some mall walkers, and when I run into them in the mall, they are so focused they barely take the moment to recognize your presence.

I am afraid to know what might happen if you got in their way, or tried to stop them and talk to them.

The thing about mall walkers is they are focused. Each step is intentional. They have chosen to be there to exercise and nothing is getting in their way of accomplishing that goal.
I don’t think I will ever be a mall walker.

But mall walkers got me thinking . . . actually I had been reading . . . and things just started to connect.

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So if you have been reading my blogs then you know that I have been reading through the book of Jeremiah lately.

And as I have been reading there have been some big themes that have been popping out.

1) Why do God’s people suffer?
2) Why do evil people prosper?

These are two big questions that Jeremiah wrestles with. Now before I go on, I don’t want to say this is how things always are . . . but this is how things were for Jeremiah, and that’s how things have started to connect for me . . . so that’s where we start.

Issue # 1 – why God’s people suffer?

So for Jeremiah the question of why God’s people suffer was answered simply
“because they have turned away from Me (God)”

The New American Standard Version paints this picture of “turning away” as walking away. I think that picture is extremely accurate for what happens.

Over and over again Jeremiah says that God’s people walked after things other than God, and that they chose paths which did not include God.

Big point: So one reason why God’s people suffer is because they have walked away from God and toward other things.

Issue # 2 – why evil people prosper ?

God answers this second answer simply as well.

“don’t worry about them . . . I will deal with them”

This isn’t the answer Jeremiah wants . . . because if God’s people are going to suffer, then it makes sense that those people who don’t love or follow God should suffer too.

But God reassures Jeremiah over and over again that He will judge the wicked.

Big point: God will deal with the wicked in his time, they will not go un-judged.

so let’s bring this all together . . . what happens when you put . . .

mall walkers , suffering godly people, prospers evil doers, and God?
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I don’t know about you but I have felt like Jeremiah felt. Actually I can feel what Jeremiah felt right now in my life. I feel like my life is falling apart and I cry out to God and I ask why would you do this? Why would you let this happen to me ? Haven’t I always done my best to serve you ? Haven’t I done my best to live my life for you? Why do I suffer ? Or are you even there ?

I also look at the world, and even people in my life and wonder how God could allow them to have such a good life, when they don’t care what He says, or what He wants from them.
I know what these things feel like

So again I question . . . God where are you in all of this ?

I think we all do this . . . question if God is really there.
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So let’s connect

When we call God’s presence into question we are really just vocalizing or realizing that we don’t feel close to God.

For Jeremiah God’s people were far from God because they walked away from him.

This walking thing is huge. Walking is an intentional thing. You don’t just randomly walk. Walking isn’t an involuntary action. Walking requires purpose. You choose where you are going to go, and then you put one foot in front of another until you get there.

Just like mall walkers . . . there is a purpose, a focus, a goal.

So why is it that God describe what happened to his people as their walking away ?

Sometimes we say that Christians have fallen away, or wandered from the path. Both of those phrases seem very “accidental.” Like you were just living your life for Jesus and then one day . . . oops . . . you accidentally were living for something else.

God describes the relationship, the dynamic as our walking away. Our purposeful choosing.
That changes everything . . . doesn’t it.

Let me be clear . . . I’m not saying that we sit around as Christians as say . . .” ok, tomorrow I am going to stop loving God”

But what we do, is we make active choices that go against God, and we think that we will be ok. That somehow we can knowingly choose against God, and it won’t be “a deal breaker” with him.
And as we make that choice against him, we take one step away from him, and then the next time we choose “not Him” we take another step, and another, and another.

The feeling of being far away from God has nothing to do with what God is or is not doing . . . but has everything to do with our choices, our lives, and what we are purposefully walking toward each day.

Rob Bell puts it this way,

“God is always present. We are the ones who show up.”

God’s point to Jeremiah was that, He had always and would always be God. Jeremiah didn’t have to worry about it. But what Jeremiah needed to do, was to walk toward God. And to encourage , lead , and direct his people to do the same thing.

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So if you are feeling far away from God. Know this . . . you may have walked away. He is there. But maybe you aren’t. That’s not a great thing to hear, but healing comes from being honest with yourself. Maybe today you need to admit to yourself, and a close friend that you haven’t been walking toward God. But you have been walking toward other things (school, friends, job, bf / gf , popularity, video games, shopping, etc.)

That could be your first step back toward God.

Because as crazy as this life can be . . . it really is as simple as walking.
Take the step today toward God, then tomorrow take the next step. Then the next and the next.

Pursue God with the intensity of a mall walker, and you won’t have anything to worry about. God is there and he is doing his job. So let’s do ours, and walk toward him

For my King
-devin

waves

there is something magical about the ocean

if you have never been to the ocean, you need to go just for the experience . . .

you might hate it . . . but seriously there is nothing like it.

it had been almost 3 years since i had been to the ocean . . . far too long

i love the ocean, i might just move so i can be closer to it.

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this past week I was in florida, visiting some family and taking a little vacation from the craziness that I call my life. It was a great time hanging out with my cousins and jut relaxing but more than that . . . it was one of the most spiritually refreshing experiences I have had in a while.

Over the last few days I was able to connect with God and clarify so much about who He is and about who He has created me to be. I realized that I haven't been true to the true self that God wants to create in me. I have sacrificed that for other things, and other people.

It kinda stinks that it took the waves to get me to understand these things. These things were right in front of me the whole time . . . but it took something more to get me out of my funk.
maybe you have never thought about it but I think that waves are very spiritual things.
the paint a very good depiction of life, and really make us think about how God works.
at first glance the waves look awesome . . . you run as fast as you can, and dive into the salty goodness. It is refreshing, it is moving, it is alive . . . your crew is with you. You are playing around, throwing a football, dunking each other, having chicken fights. Nothing could be better . . .

but sometimes the waves take control . . . and suddenly all the fun is gone. The break so hard against you that you lose your balance . . . sometimes you become disoriented. You lose sight of everything, and you desperately want to get your feet back on dry land.

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life is not very different. the waves look great . . . everything in our life seems great. We have those we love around us, and we are playing the game of life . . . doing what we want and enjoying every minute of it.

but then something happens, things shift and life isn't so much fun anymore. you lose control of your life and you wonder what happened ? All you want is for things to go back to the way they used to be.

but the reality is that once you have experienced the reality of the waves . . . you never look at them the same, they have a different quality . . . something has changed. Not that it is bad . . . it's just more real . . . it has more significance
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sometimes I wonder why God lets us deal with the waves of life (especially those who love him, and are doing the best we can). I think there has to be a reason . . . he has to be able to use the experience.

as I sat on the beach this week I think i realized it. I was sitting in the ocean . . . grabbing handfuls of sand, and as the tide came in watching it wash away the dirt and reveal all of the beautiful shells.

what a powerful image . . . i think God lets us experience the waves to wash away the dirt; to get rid of the unnecessary things in our lives. The writer of hebrews describes Jesus as the "author and perfecter of our faith" . . . i think the waves are part of that perfecting process.

so when the waves crash in your life . . . don't forget that they have meaning . . . God won't waste them . . . he will use them to bring out the beautiful "shells" that he has given you, and wants you to discover.

so when the waves crash, don't be discouraged . . . your king has not abandoned you, he is working through the waves, so embrace them, ride them trust that the waves will reveal how awesome God is.

keep fighting for your king

-dev